Christian.

I've been mulling a certain topic over in my head for a while now; and the topic is denominations within my "religious" preference. And just as a preface if you're reading this and don't know me, I am a Christian. I've talked it over with several people I trust who fall anywhere on the spectrum from Reformed Baptist to straight up Charismatic in the truest sense of the word. I feel this is a topic a lot of people have A LOT of energy around and usually feel extremely devout to their stance and position. It actually makes me happy to see someone so devout to their views and interpretation of the Word, because to me, it means they really care and have done their homework and have scriptural evidence backing up what they are standing on. 

I am not a theologian on any level or have ever claimed to be! But, I guess it struck me at some point that I come from a pretty charismatic, tongue speaking, soaking in the presence of God, miracle believing background. And while I take no issue with any of the aforementioned practices, I also have seen a LOT of weirdness within the vein I've come from. A lot of times, there were things I just couldn't understand or reconcile in a way where I was seeing scripture to back up or confirm certain "prophets" messages or instructions to a congregation... It's almost a little hard to describe what I'm referring to without sounding disrespectful to the people who were leading such gatherings, and that wouldn't be my intention, but if you've been in this realm of ministry you know what I'm saying.

I've had friends counsel me to not pick apart a certain "denomination" and pick and choose the parts I felt I agreed with, because it means there are holes or flaws within that groups thinking or belief system. While all of these different groups ultimately believe in Jesus as the Savoir of the world, the Messiah come and only through Him there is forgiveness and redemption in the blood He shed; and then by rising again from the grave defeated death; there are lot of other bunny trails (so to say) that can be implemented or taught and they all fall under that core belief system. While I understood the heart of what that particular friend was saying to me in regards to not only taking bits and pieces, I sort of felt like that's who I am.

I think I am just a person who wholeheartedly believes every word of the Bible, and know Jesus is the only way, and that it can sometimes be really confusing to interpret scripture into our culture and time in history, but that we have the Holy Spirit living IN us to help and guide our minds in hearts in deciphering the scriptures. I do think God does things differently in moments from one person to the next, and the revelation one person gets from a portion of scripture might not be the same understanding another person gets. And bottom line is I don't think that's wrong. I just think that is GOD. He meets every single person, in their own way, at their own time, and how He needs to speak to them for that person to feel His presence and power in their lives.


I however do NOT believe that means God will allow sin or justification of things that aren't right, and it doesn't mean people are literally free to just run wild and think they're under God's direction or anointing. But that's a whole different conversation.  That's truly why this is such a sticky subject though, He allowed all of us to have free will, which can lead to things that for certain aren't lining up with the Word. I think for me, at the beginning of all of this, I just wanted to know why I believed what I did, and why I'm drawn to the Bill Johnson's, and Jason Upton's and the people who I felt were/are bringing the presence of God to our world.

And I realize everything I'm writing is somewhat inconclusive and a little ambiguous, but I'm still mulling through it all. I just know that there ARE truly parts of the Charismatic movement that to me feel like God's presence and power to me, and I see in the Bible where it's backed up. Just like I see where other denominations get things that they stand by. I think my real opinion is that I wish the Body of Christ didn't divide themselves into "sects" and into different divisions. I'm not a Christian to follow anyone's interpretation of the scriptures besides Jesus's interpretation. I don't know that it was ever the original intention of the Gospel message to be divided like we have. And, maybe it does serve people better, or maybe it's doing the Body of Christ a disservice because it does bring division.

There's just enough division in the world right now, and as a Christian I feel like it's partly my responsibility to bring peace where there is division, and that is hard when some of my own are so deeply divided. We have the roadmap. We have the Spirit to guide us. I really believe we can work together to bring healing to this world. It will be hard. It does mean laying down pride, stubborn thoughts and sins, but this life we have to live is so short. And I know for sure that I want to continually live with eternity in my site. And to know this part (the part that feels so huge and overwhelming and all encompassing) is really just a breath.

(Oh, and update for anyone who read my last post about our baby boy... Week 2 with specialist showed no progression of the cord issue, and it has remained stable. No new red flags either! Thank you all for praying and I would ask that you continue to do so! It was definitely good news, and little guy has about 8 more weeks to keep growing healthy and strong!!)