7 Days!

In exactly one [1] week I will be on my way to Nashville, to spend the night there then board my plane the next morning! I am soo excited!!

California...it won't be to much longer now! :)

My Vineyard

I don't know what inspired this within me, but one of the "top [let's say] 20" accomplishments that I want to achieve in my life is to own a Vineyard. You know, like, grow grapes, make wine out of them, and create a label then sell it to the masses :) It just sounds like fun to me!

I am partially Italian, so maybe that bit of Italian blood in me is calling out to its roots, or something!

Just picture it; a gentle warm breeze, and the smell of earth and a hint of sweetness in the air from the fruit. Perfectly even lines of grape vines almost as far as your eyes can see...and a vintage villa in Tuscany or Napa California! [with all the modern stuff inside, of course!!] in the back drop. It sounds like such a peaceful existence. I really haven't always been one to dream in this realm of actually enjoying my life here on earth. I've been around a lot of groups who say it's just going to be chaos on this planet till Jesus comes back, and that I should just be content to live a humble life. I am fine with that option too though, to be honest. I just don't know if I want to live in the shadow of impending doom. Aren't we supposed to take dominion over the world? Conquer the land and take over the "mountains"? I say we are! But I also say we do it from a different approach than maybe we've seen in the past.

Here's a little example. I have a good friend out in California at the moment and he's an awesome dude, loves God and is serving him with his whole heart. He's an incredibly talented musician and he is definitely [in my opinion] called to dominate the media/arts industry and claim it for our Lord and King. He does things slightly unconventionally at times though, and it may rub people the wrong way, but I know he's getting places where most Christians wouldn't even think of going, cuz they judge it as wrong. But I believe he is doing exactly what God has called him to do.

Now, what's that have to do with a vineyard? Not much I guess. I mean, maybe it would be slightly weird if the best selling wine on the face of the earth was manufactured and produced by a person who loves Jesus. But that doesn't seem wrong to me, even though it's different. I know this isn't ALL I am called to. I don't even know if I can say "I'm called" to do this--I just know that it's a very real desire in my heart. Up there with meeting the man God has for me, being a mommy and serving God and loving the people in this world until the day I die. Maybe it'll happen, and maybe it won't. I know if it does though it's going to be a refuge for my family and for the body of Christ.

On top of all of that, it's just fun to dream with God :)
Try it sometime and see where He takes you!
The possibilities are endless, and possible.

dwell in the midst of us...

In a church where resolve is slowly leaking out of the half hearted life styles of some "American Christians" I am so encouraged when I walk into a church and hear a message that is not watered down.

I was still laying in bed this morning, and pondering the sermon I had heard the night before; and I thought to myself,

            "Somewhere along the way the sermons that are supposed to make you feel all "good inside" but bring no conviction to the heart- now make me frustrated; and the sermons that come down hard and convict have become a comfort to my heart."

And I truly mean that with all of my heart. I remember being the phase where I liked going to church, cuz I liked the atmosphere, it made me feel good. I liked sipping my Cinnamon Dolche Latte as I listened to whatever speaker teach on whatever God was showing them...but it's like it was so surface. I didn't even realize it at the time. I thought I was a really good and "spiritual" person [or whatever] and thought I was doing a good thing by always going to conferences and being in houses of prayer and in worship services. But if you're going about life and doing all of these things and it doesn't change you it is for nothing.

I am in NO way saying I've arrived anywhere high or lofty, but I am saying that when God opens up a revelation to someones heart, it's busted wide open. And I know that He's shown me the difference between being a Christian because it's "in style" [perhaps in certain groups] and because you just want to tame the evil within, or being a Christian because your eyes and your heart have been enlightened and awakened to Jesus Christ and you know that you absolutely cannot live without Him. Upon that revelation, you progressively realize that you can't even exist daily without being with Him.

It's an indwelling, not a meeting.
It's a permanent residence, not just a visit.
He's here to stay.
And He is changing everything.
He is shaking everything.
And He is fierce, but He is good.

True Life.

God, you bring true life. You're so cool, cuz you're not religious & you're not mad at me for anything, you just straight LOVE me & you aren't the way most people say you are...& since i know that i feel FREE to love you how my heart was designed to & i don't have to feel bad about it. there's no formula & there's no right or wrong way either. you are love. & if i love you, then i have real love in me & i know i do.
i am so sick of people trying to put condemnation on hearts that don't need it. i am tired of people talking about "god" or "religion" and they don't even know the One who truly loves them and saved them and who died for them. They know this image they have built up in their minds and they base their relationship with the real God off of that image. it makes for a really whacked out religion and it is based on a lie.
God i want to know you, i want to know truth. to know who you really are, not who people just say you are. i want your word in ME and i want the truth of your word in me not just what my mind perceives of what i am reading. all i want is what is REAL. and i want to throw alll the other CRAPPPPPPPP out of the door and out of my mind because all i want is YOU and all i want is the TRUTH. and if that TRUTH is found in me laying down my life and simply LOVING people who you put in my life or if that truth is found in me laying out in my back yard on my hammock gazing at the stars just thinking of how amazing you are, then that is what i want to do!!!!!!!!!!! I just want YOU!!!!!!! i am sick of who people have made you and i am sick of SATAN using that against people i love.....satan you molester of souls you've gotta go, you've gotta go (nikkie love, thank you for writing that song!!!) cuz you know what I KNOW WHO I AM, AND I KNOW MY FATHER WELL.....and i am not going to hold it back and not give that truth to others!!!!! And we're all going to know who we are and we're going to be free thru the name and of Jesus....no more bondage, no more lies.

i literally refuse to settle for any less now. and nothing is going to stop me. cuz God is bigger than the boogie man, he's bigger than godzilla or the monsters on TV...and he's bigger than you and he's bigger than me and he's most definitly bigger than the devil and all of mordor that satan rules over. so, if my GOD  is for me that who can EVER stop me. absoulutly no one. and that rocks.

we are going to begin living free. and i am starting now!!! who want's to come?! ;)

"Fasting" Facebook!

So, in a day and age where you're shocked to hear that someone doesn't have a Facebook Account, and upon hearing it, wonder if that individual is of some Amish or Mennonite descent...I have done the unthinkable!

I deleted my Facebook!!

Yes, I can hear the gasps now! [Haha!] Enough of the dramatics though...and let me explain!

I have been on this adventure with the Lord for the last 4 years of my life. [Even though I was completely unaware at the time] God orchestrated a divine plan for me to up and move 6 hours away from ALL of my friends, and family [besides Jon] to move to a little town called Henderson, Kentucky. And in this little town of Henderson, He ordained the time and activities I would then execute in my life. He had this planned all along. He knew it would be one of the most intense experiences of my life, knowing that it would be very difficult in seasons and filled with joy in others.

Anyhow I can hear you wondering...."Oooook, what on earth does that have to do with Facebook?"...and here it is!!

So all this time I have been in Henderson, and I have been blessed in relationships. For the beginning of my journey God put by my side two of the most faithful and loving friends I have ever had. We journeyed together through this foreign land and...God [probably] said it was good! Then He chose to take those two away from Henderson [much to my sadness] but He was so faithful to bring new friends into my life. Even though they could never replace what I had previously, it was a blessing and comfort. Because who doesn't like companionship to walk this road of life with?

And as I've been journeying on, friends coming and friends going, God has always made sure that I have someone there to encourage me, lift me up in hard moments--and for me to do likewise for them. And now, I feel Him moving upon my heart--and lovingly threatening to go with me where I've never gone before...

On a further journey...alone with Him.

And if you know me, you know I love people. I love socializing, and being with groups of people basically all the time. Yet, I hear his beckoning..."Come away with ME!"

And that can be soo hard to do in a society where you can be in constant communication with someone basically at all moments of the day...when that intimacy and flow of relationship was meant to be contained with in the confines of our relationships' with God.

So I guess it is more symbolic, so to say-- deleting my Facebook. It's like I am saying to God, I hear you...and I want what you have for me too. I want to go to that secret place with You God, and I am willing to lay down everything that I have previously thought that I needed to survive in this life. And it's like I am just conveying to myself and Him that I am trusting Him to keep the people in my life who need to be there.

This would have scared me so much a few years ago. Being so far from the majority of my friends, in moments I've felt like I need to scramble constantly to hold onto them all, just because I love them. But I think I am seeing the deeper truth that my heart didn't exactly understand until recently.

He is everything. He's all I need. And He loves relationships, He made them. And He loves blessing us with in relationships...but nothing can ever win over the relationship that I need to have with Him.

He is my husband. [after all, what husband wouldn't feel slightly disheartened if all you were ever trying to do it pour into other relationships??]

So...I am just really excited to see where this new season goes...and to see the places He is going to take me.

26 Days!

26 days from now--it will be like I've gone to Heaven.
26 days from now--an amazing adventure will begin.
26 days from now--

I AM GOING TO CALIFORNIA!!!!! :D

And we're going to go to Disneyland!! And a million beaches!! And get super tan!!

I feel like a little kid waiting for Christmas!!

Ohhh, only 26 sweet more days!

Whirlwind!!

It's only been about a month since school began! It has been insane!!! And I mean that in the best way possible, encompassing that I truly love being in school...regardless of how each week could use another 48 hours or so in it...just to catch up on sleep!!

Honestly though--overall it's been an awesome experience! Aside from last week when my body decided to crash and burn--and I felt like death for like 4 days! But, praise the Lord that's over--and now--on to more work and school, work and school, work and school...and church!! Then more work and school! :) But hey--I asked for it! And I do like it! The mundane has never suited me for too long though. At about the point where I can do something in my sleep is where I should do something else for a while to prevent myself from being bored to death. You know? You have to mix things up a little bit, keep it exciting!! I guess this is an art that many college students before me have perfected--or--they've just pressed on and been insanely bored for 4[ish] years of their lives, then began the fun parts of life!

I will not wait though--no--you've got to live while you're alive!! And, seize the day! :)

So to satisfy this hunger within--I have decided to go to California [over spring break!] to visit my sister, and to escape this desolate tundra!!!  And bring some people along with me!! [Jon and Ashley!] It'll be a great adventure!

I can hardly wait for March 7, 2011 to get here!!